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Having PTSD and being triggered with no drugs fucking sucks

Self medicating? Who isn't?!? What is your experience with alcohol & other drug use and abuse as coping mechanisms, recreation, enlightenment, or self-destruction? How do you deal with their grip? 12-step, harm reduction, visionary ritual, total indulgence and any other perspectives welcome.

Having PTSD and being triggered with no drugs fucking sucks

Postby Spinygrrl » May 31, 2016 7:18 pm

I could really use like 3 muscle relaxers and an ambien right now. Nothing good, long term, will happen should I do this. And I'm not going to, at least not today. But jfc, there is a price either way. And they don't so much tell you about the sober one.

Like this: I'm slightly better after talking to a well muscled friend who's cool with stabbings as solutions to certain problems, but my arms and legs still feel like crampy string cheese, I haven't made dinner and feel shame, and I really hope tonight is not the fourth night of very little nightmare plagued sleep, but it's anyone's guess, really, plus the main thing that greater awareness of my mental condition has brought is that I can feel the trauma compounding like stacked books in a fascist burn pile.

Whereas if I had just a few certain chems, I might not even remember the horrors that tonight may bring.

But I don't know, eventually I'd probably OD and die or start drinking again and then well yknow if you've read my blog for the past ten years you already know all about that, so.

There are reasons people use drugs. Good reasons.

But alas they are not for me... So tonight, sobriety, PtSd and the Demons of the Spined One get to have a goddamn tea party in mah head.

Solid,

Spiny the Sleepless

Feel free to speak on this topic, or else leave your messages about how great your current drug regime is so I can escape my pain by living yours vicariously - in solidarity - thanks
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Re: Having PTSD and being triggered with no drugs fucking su

Postby stonefruits » May 31, 2016 8:05 pm

ah sorry you are suffering. it sucks to weigh drugs vs not drugs because both have consequences. maybe there's like some kinda herbal thing you can take
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Re: Having PTSD and being triggered with no drugs fucking su

Postby equidancers » May 31, 2016 8:20 pm

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Last edited by equidancers on Jun 26, 2016 10:36 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Having PTSD and being triggered with no drugs fucking su

Postby babblefish » May 31, 2016 10:02 pm

The internet ate a post that I made on this particular theme in my present. I really wish it hadn't. Getting it out in the open might have helped.
I feel you.
there is a crack in everything. that's how the light gets in.
~ l. cohen
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Re: Having PTSD and being triggered with no drugs fucking su

Postby red sunday » Dec 27, 2018 11:52 pm

Dr. Red Sunday here.

oh am I all too familiar with this bullshit. I have pretty bad flashbacks myself. If you can...try to get on an anxiety med like lorazepam.

until then, I am going to prescribe you Opium. all you have to do is smoke it, and I promise you will forget all your worries.

((Probably the best doctor ever, with no degree whatsoever....))
He who forgives ends the quarrel---African proverb
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Re: Having PTSD and being triggered with no drugs fucking su

Postby sandpiper » Dec 28, 2018 12:38 am

Opium tea made from opium poppies is good medicine.
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